What unfinished projects from 2014 are you willing to release now? (Regret not required.)
I had planned to write a novel documenting what happened to my family during our year and a half ordeal. When I finally sat down last month and began recounting the earliest days of 2013, I walked away from my laptop with distress in my heart. Remembering the events and emotions scratched open the still fresh scabs that haven’t quite formed into durable scar tissue yet. Everything came flooding out, and I nearly had a nervous breakdown. I refuse to write that novel — EVER. While I originally thought it might encourage other mothers (and fathers) going through similar issues, provide a therapeutic outlet to process my thoughts, and perhaps even net some income to repay the debts caused by the events, I now know that this story isn’t meant to be shared further. What’s been published has been published. What’s been journaled has been journaled. There is nothing cathartic about it. I am releasing it and letting it remain in the past. I have learned from it, but it will not become my life. I will not make a living being known for THAT, nor will I spend my days torturing myself over how others tortured me and my family.
What a powerful realization to have and what exquisite self-care to honor the knowing. Good for you! And may the path ahead bring much happiness.
Deborah Weber recently posted..Reverb14 Day 2: Release
Good on you, M! You have new stories to write. x
Kat recently posted..Reverb14 Day 3: loving what is
I understand (having experienced something similar). Sometimes it’s too painful (and unnecessary) to relive what is now in the past. So glad you and your family can now move forwards together!