Let’s review our month so far. What have you been doing to cultivate a life worth living? What challenges have you faced so far? What solutions can you brainstorm to overcome those challenges? I’ll go first…
I’m facing the very real probability that moving day has become an indefinite again. I anticipated a higher monthly income, but the nature of my circumstances is such that I’m still incapable of getting that shiny new place. I found a place that seemed almost too good to be true, even — and it was. The pet deposit was obscene. You cannot claim to be pet friendly if you charge a per-pet pet deposit — it’s the same carpeting that would be replaced once. Asides from the carpeting, I can’t imagine what else they’d need money for. I paid a $100 pet deposit once for any and all pets I’d ever have when I lived in my last apartment complex. But I digress. I’m faced with the probability that even March 1st may not be reasonable unless I take aggressive actions in order to remove myself from this situation. The ugly D-monster has been rearing its angry head, pinning me to the ground with a vengeance, telling me I’m not good enough to make it.
Those are my challenges. Now, I do have some ideas brainstormed to overcome these challenges, but I do need to maintain a certain level of ambiguity with regards to those ideas. Those actions are easier planned than completed, though. To some extent, I also have to rely on others to complete those actions, too. However, there are a great number of things I can do to cultivate a life worth living for the interim. It’s going to require allowing myself to feel anxious, angry, frustrated, and depressed when those emotions arise. When those emotions arise, it’s best not to try talking myself out of it. Instead, I need to care for myself. I need to step away from what I’m doing and whatever’s upsetting me, and I need to drink some water or tea and rest. It takes a lot more energy to be unhappy than it does to be happy, I’ve found. If I give myself some time to rest and recoup my energy, I can better face the challenges ahead of me. Admittedly, I haven’t been cultivating good sleeping habits anyway. I also haven’t enjoyed enough tea (or infusions, for that matter). A little simple self-care and solitude can make a huge difference in my outlook, and I need to stop approaching life as though these simple steps are unreasonable. They’re not. I’m human, and my energy reserves and limits are finite. I must accept that in order to cultivate a life worth living.
The dates may have changed, but situations and circumstances don’t change over night. It’s our responsibility to change our perspectives and our situations — which also can’t happen. That’s why the Cultivate project exists. It will take some time to cultivate ourselves and our lives, but it’s going to be a worthwhile journey.